Summer, I am not your biggest fan. In case you've been blinded by your own hype, here's a short list of your failings as a season:
- Weather. It's hot. It's humid. It's time for a nap.
- Moisture. Heat + Humidity = Sweat. I have never been familiar with the mystery of the female 'glow'. I sweat, I shine, I trickle, and I even occasionally drip. No delicate flower am I.
- Sunshine. While I enjoy the sunshine, sunset at 10pm just throws off my internal clock. And sunrise at 5:30am? NO THANK YOU.
- Birthday. My birthday arrives at the height of summer. It is after the best warm weather sales are over, when the stores are heavily stocked with Back-to-School garb. Nothing says Summer Birthday like a wool sweater! Plus, it's far enough into the season that most school friends were vacationing with family & couldn't join me for a little celebrating. An August birthday is a lonely time for a kid.
- Bugs. Between the mosquitoes outside and the fruit flies inside, I spend the days & nights flailing like a marionette with a 4 year old puppeteer.
- Clothes. Tanks, shorts, and teeny bikinis are not my garb of choice. Less is more, ladies - Wrap The Gift!
- Food. OK, this is my least contentious point about summer. I love the fresh fruit, the sweet ripe berries, the taste of a burger right off the grill. What I don't like is not using my oven from June-September.
- Driving. Road Rage, anyone? I swear, bad drivers get even worse when the mercury rises.
- Time off. I have the worst luck booking almost any appointment in the summer. Everyone opens late or closes early or is shut down for 3 weeks of fly fishing in Sweden.
I am so tired I can't even think of a #10. I am going to retire to my bedroom, crank the window A/C, and refresh myself with a 'rest'. Throw the kids a couple of popsicles & wake me when Fall is here, OK?