Baby Stuff

For me, one of the most stressful things about parenting is the plethora of baby stuff out there. As a second time parent, I should be used to seeing all the Must-Have's, the Baby Necessities, and the You-Are-A-Terrible-Parent-If -You-Don't-Buy-Your-Kid-This-Right-NOW's.

But I'm not used to it. And while I have my go-to baby stuff, I sometimes wonder if I'm missing out on something. Ex: The Bumbo. It wasn't around for Big Sis, and seems like it would have a limited amount of usefulness. Well, I did buy one (secondhand), and I really do use it. No, I won't use it until he's 5, but I dare you to name a 'baby' item that you WILL use until your kid is 5. If I get a solid 12 months of use out of a baby item, I call it worthwhile. And the fact that I have a few things I've held on to, and used for both kids - bonus. I'm not sure the Aquarium bouncer will survive a 3rd baby, but we've definitely gotten our money's worth out of it.


The latest item I am puzzling over is the Sleep Sack. It seems like a good idea: Keep your baby warm without having to worry that they'll smother themselves in the quilt you spent 2 months making by hand. But it also seems like one of those things that a baby would either love or hate. And I have a sneaking suspicion mine would hate it. Something about being confined in a warm, fuzzy sleeping bag just doesn't jibe with his desire to kick his feet up in the middle of the night and grasp the edge of his crib with his toes. And the second he figures out how to wiggle up onto his knees? It's ALL over.

If the Poo Fits...

Wear It.

Big J is a growing boy, and is growing far more rapidly than Big Sis did. As such, his expanding body is using every ounce of milk and every bite of solids, with little left over as 'waste'. When this is the case, he doesn't poo very often -maybe every 10 days or so. You can imagine the results when it does happen.

Well, yesterday was the lucky day. He woke up bright and early at 5:30am, and while snuggling in bed, I heard the near-forgotten sounds of rumbly intestines. I figured I'd wait a few minutes and be sure he'd gotten it all out before changing his diaper. I didn't want to be surprised on the changing table (Moms - you know what I'm talking about. No one needs to start their day off with a veritable fountain of poo). After a few minutes, I heard round 2, and thought it was safe to begin the cleansing. As to be expected, he had quite a present for me, and soiled his sleeper too. It was enough to warrant a bath, so I ran the water, rinsed him under the faucet, then plopped him in the tub. I turned around for a minute, then turned back and saw he had executed round 3 in the tub. I popped the drain, ran the water again, rinsed, and cleaned him as best I could under the running water. I got him dried and dressed and we were good to go for the day.

A few hours later he was hopping around in his jumper and he started fussing. I let him go for a few minutes not thinking much of it. Big Sis suddenly yells out "EWWWWWW - MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!"

I look over at him, and he's got poo running down both legs, dripping onto the carpet. Clean-up the Sequel began with another rinse off, another bath, and a second set of clothes. It continued with carpet scrubbing and Jumper cleansing. And it finished with bathtub scrubbing due to the fallout from the bath and cleansing (not to mention a change of clothes for me due to residual poo runoff).

That was a lot of poo for one day. I'm sort of glad it will probably be at least a week before I have to expect it again. Ain't kids grand?

Other updates:

With the help of my friend Robyn, I finagled ballet slippers for Big Sis. I appreciate all the other offers of help, too.

I made chocolate cream pie and key lime pie for the event on Tuesday night. Not my finest efforts. If I had known it was a contest, I would have pulled out all the stops. The chocolate cream was a first for me, and a semi-failure. It needed to be thicker & I should have used better quality chocolate. Something to work on for the future.

Sleepy McSleeperton - Here!

Oh. My. Gosh. Big J slept for 5 hours+ last night. I put him down at 7:30, no pacifier, and he did not wake up until after 1am. We both got up at 7am. Oh happy, happy day.

I probably shouldn't be celebrating yet, but I will take even a single night of good sleep as proof that better things are coming.

Paging Sleepy McSleeperton

I've been debating on posting a sleep/ general-Big-J-update. He'll be 5 months old in a few days, so I'll do some gushing then, but for now....

We've regressed since I last posted about Big J's progress (or lack thereof). We spent several weeks crying, screaming, and struggling through cry it out, sleeping in the crib, and breaking off the pacifier. After much discussion, Big Daddy and I decided that we were not improving anything. J had become moody, quiet, a little withdrawn, and hardly ever smiled anymore. He'd give me a little grin in the morning, but was definitely becoming a different baby. I adore my happy, talkative, smiley boy, and it was breaking my heart to see him changing so much. And not for the better. So he's back to bed with us again. And he's sleeping for 3 hour chunks, and he's happy again. He also gets the pacifier, but only when I know he is tired. I struggle with my fear of seeing him with a plug in his mouth at age 4, but it's balanced by the magic of it all. When I know he's really tired, I can pop it in and he'll be asleep in 60 seconds. I temper my guilt over the Great Regression of 2008 with the confidence of knowing this is MY Family, and I feel that I know what works for us. We're not giving up, we're just delaying until he is more ready.

Much of this is also tied into nursing. I'm not ready to wean him, and I know that if I were, he'd be sleeping more soundly in his own crib (it just wouldn't be worth it for him to wake in the middle of the night). Selfish? Perhaps. But leche is the best food for him, and until he hits 6 months, we're sticking to it. We'll reevaluate in another month or so and see what changes have occurred. He very well may be my last baby, and I am in no great hurry for him to grow up even faster than he has in the last 5 months.

The No-Sleep Chronicles or How to Get Your Baby to Sleep in His Crib in Only 21 Easy Steps

1. Keep reading The Baby Whisperer. Wonder if you are a bad parent, stupid, or just have a difficult baby. Decide on none of the above. Decide to try some of book's suggestions.
2. 6pm: Feed Baby
3. 7:30pm: Ignore book's suggestion to create a consistent nightly ritual. Too tired to bathe him every night. Dress Baby in PJ's. Worry that Baby will get confused by not having a bath every night. Decide Baby is a Genius, and will know he is not dirty enough to need bath every night. Pat self on back for having Genius Baby.
4. 7:35pm: Let Baby play in Jumper.
5. 7:45pm: Feed Baby again.
5. 8:00pm: Note that Baby is tired. Take Baby into bedroom to try and get Baby to sleep. Baby no longer acts tired & end up talking, singing, and tickling Baby for half an hour.
6. 8:30pm: Baby acting tired again. Hold, pat and stroke Baby's head until he is dozy. Place Baby in crib with paci in mouth. Pat self on back for putting Baby to bed so easily. Wonder how long it will last.
7. 9:00pm: Hear Baby cry. Go to crib, replace paci. Sneak out.
8. 9:05pm: Hear Baby cry. Go to crib, replace paci, stroke Baby's head to soothe. Sneak out.
9. 9:15pm: Hear Baby cry. Replace paci, stroke head, pat chest, tuck in blanket. Sneak out.
10. 9:23pm: Hear Baby cry. Replace paci, sneak out.
11. 10:45pm: Baby is quiet. Wonder if Baby is still breathing. Sneak into room, check Baby. All OK.
12. 10:50pm: Argue with Husband about how to sleep train Baby. Decide to no longer feed Baby in bed. Feel sad, but want to sleep so desperately am ready to wear noise-cancelling headphones to bed.
13. 11:30pm: End argument with Husband. Baby wakes up. Bring Baby to sofa to feed in the dark, in hopes that he will sleep for at least 5 more hours.
14. 12:00am: Place Baby in crib. Parents in bed.
15. 1:30am: Husband wakes & sits up in bed, listening for Baby breathing. Hear nothing. Panic and leap out of bed to crib. Place hand on Baby. Baby is breathing, and is now pissed I woke him up. Paci in mouth, pat, stroke head, soothe Baby back to sleep. Breathe sigh of relief.
16. 2:30am: Hear Baby wake and fuss. Poke husband to get up and soothe him. Poke husband again. Poke husband again. Husband pokes back. Get up and soothe Baby.
17. 3:00am: Hear Baby wake & fuss. Start to get out of bed to soothe him. Husband tries to pull me back. Want to punch Husband in face; soothe Baby instead.
18. 4:00am: Baby wakes & is hungry. Take Baby to sofa to eat. Baby falls asleep after 10 minutes. Take Baby back to crib. Baby wakes up, gets mad. Bring Baby to bed.
19. 5:45am: Baby wakes & is hungry again. Wonder if Baby is part Giant. Wonder what grocery bill will be when Baby is 14. Am glad husband will be doctor, as am sure we will need to invest in our own Costco franchise in order to keep Baby's tummy full. Bring Baby to sofa to eat.
20. 6:00am: Place Baby back in crib. Baby coos and gurgles to himself. Think Baby is most adorable, handsome Baby in town. But still wish Baby would sleep more than 3 hours in a row so nervous breakdown doesn't occur.
21. 6:30am: Put Baby in jumper. Baby falls asleep with toy in mouth after 10 minutes. Cute Baby! Sleepy Baby! Tired Mommy!

I May Never Sleep Again

I know people say this all the time when you have kids. But Malaina wasn't that difficult in the sleep department. At about 3 or 4 months, she had a relatively consistent sleep schedule. 2 naps during the day, about an hour and a half each, and bedtime around 9pm until 8am. Totally do-able. But Justin is killing me. He naps for no more than 20 minutes a day, unless we happen to be driving. And it can take me a good hour and a half to get him settled down at night. I finally went to the library and checked out Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. It's a common sense book that stresses the importance of a schedule for the baby. And of course, this schedule should begin from Day One. I started reading the book last night after struggling to get him to sleep once again. A few things seem to be working, but I need to break his dependence on eating in the middle of the night. He doesn't really eat, just snacks & falls back asleep. It's twice as bad, as I am exhausted and fall asleep as soon as I get him snuggled up next to me. He wouldn't settle down last night, and I finally caved at 4 am when I knew he was hungry and wanted to eat. Of course that was also the first time I actually slept last night.

Nap time was nightmare-ish today. He fell asleep at church twice, but didn't sleep for more than 20 minutes each time. When we got home, I followed the book, and as soon as I saw him rubbing his eyes and staring into the distance, I cuddled him, patted him, and laid him in the crib. He went down like a dream, but 20 minutes later he was awake again. I tried soothing him, but nothing worked for more than a few minutes. Then he got MAD. I don't like the idea of 'crying it out', but nothing seemed to console him. I knew he wanted to eat for a few minutes, but I also knew he wasn't really hungry (I had fed him about an hour prior). I stayed strong, and just tried to soothe him by carrying him, rocking him, patting him, etc. No go. This was his first full blown tantrum, and it was hard to listen to (I'm a total sucker for crying, and always want to hold & comfort the kids). After a good half hour+, he settled down again and slept for another 30 minutes, but was then wide awake. Of course he later fell asleep in his Jumper (it's like Ambien for babies).

I'm not one of those moms who hover and race in at the slightest sound, but he seems to wind up really easily when it comes to sleep. I end up laying in bed, listening for him to start to whimper and end up just being really tense and not sleeping at all. I can't do this forever unless I can support a serious caffeine habit. And that wouldn't be healthy right now. I feel overwhelmed, as I know the issue is intertwined with sleep, crib, family bed, and nursing. I know I've given him bad habits, but just don't know how to go about breaking them (or where to start first). I am just so very very tired.

Today's the Day!

We are having a baby today! We're at t-minus 3 hours and counting until we need to be at the hospital, and I can't wait! It was a weird night last night (wouldn't you know it), but today seems to be going OK so far. Of course I was excited, so I had a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Malaina woke up at 3:30, and wanted to sleep in our bed. Normally it's not a big deal to get her back into her own bed, but she started to yell and cry about it (totally not normal for her - I think that given her meltdown yesterday, she is feeling anxiety over her brother coming). I got her back into her bed and rubbed her back for a while, then took another hour + to fall asleep myself. Neither of us ended up getting up until almost 9! Now I have just 2 hours to finish up my stuff at home (yes, I was mopping the floors at 9pm last night - among other things), and head out to the hospital. I am grateful that Malaina will be safe & entertained while we're at the hospital (thanks again to the Mons Family), and I hope things go smoothly and quickly.

PS - looks like the house sale is back on again. The buyer took our counter offer, which was to pay $1,000 towards the repairs of her choice (and a big pfftttt to her list of $10K in requested repairs). I nearly dropped the phone when I heard the message from our realtor.

40 days and counting

So here's the lowdown - I'm 33, married, with a 3 yo daughter (aka the Girl or Peaches). My husband Matt is a full-time student, and I work. I'm not sure why I feel compelled to start a blog, but it's a crazy time right now, and maybe this will help me to work through some stuff... so here we go.

We're at 40 days and counting. 40 days until graduation - and the start of phase II of the 12 year plan. Why the 12 year plan? Because that's how long it will take for Matt to complete his undergrad degree, finish Medical School, complete a Residency, and start his practice. 12 years isn't terribly long - but I also never expected to be 33 and still in the early part of the plan. So much for living an idealized version of life. Sure, the American Dream would have been sweet, but I wouldn't trade a second of that for less time with my daughter, or for how much I value Matt and our life together. It's a struggle, but we're in it together, and that's what counts in the end. We've had a ton of issues, but through it all, it's our unified vision of the future that keeps us together and moving forward. I am so grateful for that.

So here's the plan (such as it is). Med school starts in 2.5 months, and we still don't know where we're going. DMU has a spot waiting for us (secured with $1K - no one said it would be free), but he's on the wait list for UVM. At first, I was sort of against UVM, but this was mostly due to my comfort level with DMU. We had a Plan, I had made my peace with it, and was all set mentally. Now that UVM is a realistic possibility, I've had to re-think the Plan, and wrap my head around the options. I think UVM would be awesome for us - certainly for Matt's career - but am unsettled that it may be months until we get a final word from them. It's not that my heart is set on going there - it's the NOT knowing that is driving me nuts.

I'm not helping the situation either. We're supposed to be getting the house ready to sell, but have been dragging on that. Maybe it's a passive-aggresive thing, maybe it's self-sabotaging, but I can't seem to get motivated to finish all the little stuff that needs to be done to put the house on the market. If I take a hard look at it, it's not that much stuff. But by the time I get to the weekend, I'm tired, I want to relax with the Girl, and I don't want to scrub the house down so strangers can tromp through it and nit pick all the quirks that come with living in a 90 year old house.

Here's a special little Life bonus too - we've just started trying for another Bambino, and I've stopped ovulating. I wait for 3 + years and I stop ovulating NOW? WHAT is going on? I wanted to cry when the doctor matter-of-factly told me that's what's up. So now I'm on BC pills to kick start the old bod, and next step is go on on Clomid when Aunt Flo comes to visit again. I got knocked up twice in a row with no problems, and this is what I get after being practical and waiting until we were really 'ready' for another? What the !#^#^%&*&^???? I'm not sure what the universe is trying to tell me, but I hope it reveals itself soon.